Wednesday, October 2, 2019

September 27, 2019

Dear Topaz,

Today was a very good day. It was seasonable, but a little warm for this late in September. The sun was out, and some clouds rolled in. It felt like a pretty normal day. Work went well. Of course, being Friday, people are in better spirits and with some of the senior leadership out of the office, a few extra laughs were had with my associates.

The ride to work and home was fairly typical. There's still entirely too many people who would prefer to focus on other things rather than driving. It's also nice to see some people heading out of town. I always imagine they're going a happy occasion to see family or celebrate a birthday or a wedding over the weekend.

The boys are doing well. Their grades are holding up. Of course, they're both grounded, for various things. Their room's still a mess. The youngest is getting used to middle school and the oldest decided he likes Green Day. Janine and I are very disappointed in this development, and we hope that he grows out of this terrible phase of his life soon.

Janine is holding up well. She continues on with her education and her work. The past few years, she became accustomed to you curling up with us in bed. I know she loved those extended mornings where you would sleep in with her and help her eat her breakfast. She really enjoyed the warm cuddly times. She thought for years that you would never accept her, and in your last few years, you gave her the best gift of all...your love. Just know she loves you very much too. Thank you for that. I am eternally grateful.

Even though I was often annoyed by your fascination with my feet when it was time to put my shoes on, I found it very endearing. We both will always remember your excitement anytime we got close to the refrigerator and you loudly declaring your interest in a bowl of milk. Our floors will never be cleaner without the constant pick up of vomit, urine, or poop. I always understood your anxiety though, with all of the sudden moves. The bug and bird population, while relieved a fierce predator is no longer among us, will miss you too.

The world continues to move on, but now it moves on without you. At 5:30 PM yesterday, we said goodbye to you and watched the light leave your eyes. For the first time in over 19 years, I continue on with the world. Janine and the boys continue on living their lives day by day as well. The other cats realize the new void in their lives as well. We move on with fond memories and while time will relieve our grief, the next few days will be hard. I know the boys will miss you. They'll always consider you the mean old cat that had nothing to do with them, but they knew you watched them from a distance like a good mamma would. I know Janine loved you very much and she will probably miss you more than all of us.

We go on with the comfort knowing that you no longer feel pain. My hope , as we lay you in your forever spot, is that you rest forever in that sweet, perfect peace. As much as we miss you, this first day without you was a good one, and I know you would have been pleased.



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